January 2025, reading to cope
a round two of a president trump, terrible news, tragedy everywhere, and a dry month
January was so fucking long that I read and listened to so many things. I also just wrote a long and personal essay for the paid version of my bookletter, which you can access (by paying for it!) below.
Jess Tholmer
That said, I’m keeping this intro short and getting into it. But please note: I am including a new section called “book challenges” to tell y’all what I read for any challenge I might be into at the moment—this is my ninth year doing the Book Riot “Read Harder” Challenge!
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[What I read]
Like One of the Family: Conversations from a Domestic's Life by Alice Childress (originally published 1956) | Quick summary: Each chapter is told from the perspective of Mildred talking to her friend Marge about their jobs as domestic workers for white women. It’s no surprise that I absolutely adored this book and found myself a new fan of Childress.[contemporary fiction, historical fiction, Black history, written by a Black american novelist, playwright, and actress, shorter read]
The Children Money Can Buy: Stories from the Frontlines of Foster Care and Adoption by Anne Moody (2018) | Quick summary: An illuminating look into the foster care and adoption world.
On my list for years, I decided to finally read this as I am currently studying social work, and it fits right in. Reading this felt like working at the Northwest Adoption Exchange, which I did for over five years. If you are curious about fostering or adoption, it’s a great read and a good resource if a few years old.
[nonfiction, child welfare, foster care, and adoption, written by a white american child welfare worker, adoption counselor, and director of an adoption agency, longer read]
The Women and the Men: Poems by Nikki Giovanni (1975) | Quick summary: Poems about the people and places Giovani has observed and experienced.
This should really have been called The Women, the Men, and the Places, but who am I to tell Nikki Giovanni what to do? As a non-poetry person, I like to dabble, and I really loved a few of these. Giovanni always hits just right.
[nonfiction, poetry, written by a Black american poet, writer, commentator, activist, and educator, short read]
Drinking: A Love Story by Caroline Knapp (1997) | Quick summary: Caroline Knapp’s detailed and often relatable tale of being a functional alcoholic.
I really, really liked this honest memoir and referenced it in my latest “you paid for this,” which you can read above or right here (if you pay for it). Knapp died a handful of years after this memoir, which really hurt me to find out—like I lost a friend. That’s how it feels reading her words—like we were friends.
[nonfiction, memoir, recovery, written by a white american writer and columnist, medium-length read]
[What I heard]
Sonny Boy: A Memoir by Al Pacino (2024) | Quick summary: The memoir of actor Al Pacino.
I think I will write about this memoir in more detail for a paid bookletter, but it was…perfect. It's a perfect celebrity memoir, and I still cannot believe he read the whole thing. I cried twice. What a gift this man is.
[nonfiction, celebrity memoir, film history, written by a white american actor, long listen, read by the author]
First in the Family: A Story of Survival, Recovery, and the American Dream by Jessica Hoppe (2024) | Quick summary: An intimate account of interrupting generational cycles of harm and addiction.
I also reference this memoir in my paid bookletter about dry January and drinking. My friend Lindsey recommended this one to me, and it couldn’t have possibly checked more of my boxes: a memoir (✅) written by a woman (✅) of color (✅) about family history (✅), codependency (✅), addiction (✅), and generational trauma (✅). Wow, wow, wow.
[nonfiction, addiction, sobriety memoir, written by a honduran ecuadorian writer, medium-length listen, read by the author]
The Road Is Good: How a Mother's Strength Became a Daughter's Purpose by Uzo Aduba (2024) | Quick summary: The memoir of actress Uzo Aduba.
This was nice! Aduba has a lovely speaking voice, so I enjoyed the listen. Aduba, like most celebrities, sat down to write a memoir and ended up writing about her mother. I like it when that happens.
[nonfiction, celebrity memoir, written by a Black american actress, medium-length listen, read by the author]
Evicted: Poverty and Profit in the American City by Matthew Desmond (2016) | Quick summary: Follow eight families in Milwaukee as they each struggle to keep a roof over their heads.
Fucking…excellent. Well worth the wait, as I’ve put off reading it for nearly 10 years. Desmond is an excellent journalist and, from what I can tell, a compassionate and careful one. I wasn’t sure if I was going to read this (it’s been on my literal pile for years) or listen, but hearing a Black man read it, especially because many of the families and individuals featured in Evicted are Black, helped it feel that much more authentic, heartbreaking, and for me, relatable. Desmond’s 2023 release, Poverty, is on the docket for February. I’m all in with this guy.
[nonfiction, politics, social science, written by a white american professor, sociologist, and principal investigator, longer listen, read by dion graham]
Abortion: Our Bodies, Their Lies, and the Truths We Use to Win by Jessica Valenti (2024) | Quick summary: A thorough and helpful abortion explainer in a post-Roe v. Wade world.
If you need to understand abortion right now in this particular landscape, this is absolutely the book to pick up. Valenti, who I have long followed her work, is an abortion expert, and everything she says is unemotional truth and hard fact. I will buy this for my abortion bookshelf, of course, but the read was great, too.
[nonfiction, politics, abortion, written by a white american feminist writer, shorter listen, read by the author]
Be Ready When the Luck Happens: A Memoir by Ina Garten (2024) | Quick summary: The memoir of chef and host Ina Garten.
I barely know Ina Garten, and I think she and Martha Stewart have beef, so I went into this a little protective. Of Martha? Ultimately, I left this memoir the way I went in: finding Jeffrey and Ina Garten’s relationship to be a top-notch one.
[nonfiction, celebrity memoir, written by a white american author, chef, and television host, medium-length listen, read by the author]
[Reading challenges]
For Book Riot’s 2025 Read Harder Challenge:
Drinking by Caroline Knapp: “a book about obsession.”
The Children Money Can Buy: Stories from the Frontlines of Foster Care and Adoption by Anne Moody: “a book about immigration or refugees,” as there is a heavy focus on international adoption and the complications it often involves.
Sonny Boy by Al Pacino: “a book about a piece of media you love,” as Pacino is Michael fucking Corleone, and he talks about all three Godfather movies, of course.
Be Ready When the Luck Happens by Ina Garten: “a romance book that doesn’t have an illustrated cover” because homegirl loves her husband, and I found the theme of her memoir to ultimately be their love story.
Like One of the Family by Alice Childress: “Pick a 2015 Read Harder Challenge task to complete,” in which I chose “a book published by an indie press.”
[What I recommend]
- If you like the classics: Wine in the Wilderness and Like One of the Family.
- If you like celebrity memoirs: Be Ready When the Luck Happens and Sonny Boy.
- If you like Al Pacino specifically: Sonny Boy.
- If you drink, or used to drink, wonder if you drink too much, or just love a solid memoir: Drinking and First in the Family. And Sonny Boy, actually.
- If you’re an American living in America: Abortion: Our Bodies, Their Lies, and the Truths We Use to Win.
Love you, have a nice Feb.
“Why, workin’ people are the grandest folks in the whole wide world. They set the steamships on the ocean and the lighthouse on the land, they give us our breakfast coffee and a roof over our heads at night.” Like One of the Family
“i even used to think i'd be the one
to stop the riot and negotiate the peace
then i awoke and dug
that if i dreamed natural
dreams of being a natural
woman doing what a woman
does when she's natural
i would have a revolution”
The Women and the Men
“When you quit drinking you stop waiting.” Drinking
“My mother used to take me to the movies when I was as young as three or four. She did menial work and factory jobs during the day, and when she came home, the only company she had was her son. So she’d bring me with her to the movies. She didn’t know that she was supplying me with a future.” Sonny Boy
“It never occurred to me that this cycle must be resolved in reverse order. Unless I removed the drug, I could never access the self who actually deserved the things I claimed to want.” First in the Family
“No one thought the poor more undeserving than the poor themselves.” Evicted
“This same Republican, in the very same speech, said that babies grow in women’s “bellies.” That is who is telling our daughters what they can and can’t do with their bodies and lives: a guy who talks about pregnancy like a toddler.” Abortion
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